Acorn Problems?

Had a great conversation with my mother today. When she answered the phone, she sounded relieved so I asked why. She said that she had been experiencing intermittent phone problems for the last few days and was surprised that my call actually came through. She said she had contacted the phone company and that they would be out to check to see what was up. It was her next statement that really had me scratching my head. She said she probably already knows what is wrong with her phone, she had Acorn problems.

Well, if you have been paying attention to the news these last few years, the first item that comes to mind when someone puts the words Acorn and Problems together is the political group A.C.O.R.N. (Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now). So, I was wondering what A.C.O.R.N. had done to my mother's telephone system. Let me back up a little so you understand why she didn't associate her Acorn problem with ACORN. My mother lives in the mountains in mid-California and is getting up there in years. She watches TV, but chooses to only watch the news a little because it is almost always "bad". She keeps an eye out for relevant issues to her, to her community, and any election information. Beyond that, she pretty much tunes it out, and that is very OK with me. We have had some animated discussions on current events, and since we are both more than a little hard-headed and both are on opposite sides of the political spectrum, we have agreed to disagree and don't discuss politics anymore.

Anyway, when she stated she had Acorn problems, I was ready to head out to her house and start pounding someones head in (not hers, but whoever was messing with her). When I asked exactly what problems Acorn was involved in, she said it was either squirrels or birds... Then I stopped, backed up and asked again, WHAT Acorn problems are you talking about?

Apparently, there are A LOT of oak trees where she lives. The squirrels and the woodpeckers have been overly active this year collecting acorns and storing them everywhere. She said they have been storing acorns under her shingles all winter long. She said you can see the acorns under the shingles just by standing in the driveway and looking up. She can hear the pitter-pat of little feet on her roof as they find new hiding places. Apparently two years ago the squirrels had found a hole in one of the phone boxes on the telephone pole and completely stuffed it full of acorns, thereby shorting out some phone lines. My mother tells me that the intermittent phone problems she is having this time are very similar to those of two years ago. She said the phone repairman was shocked by how full the box was of acorns, it was so full, the acorns were cutting through some of the phone wires...

She then goes on to tell me she is having plumbing problems. The water in her sink is draining so slowly that she called a plumber in today. The plumber tried all kinds of tricks to clear her drain to no avail. After he worked his 'snake' he said he hit something very solid. Since my mother does not put any solid objects (bones, potato skins, etc) down the disposal, she knew it was nothing she did. The plumber then had to go on the roof (don't understand this, but apparently there is some type of breather pipe for plumbing that can be accessed from the roof...???) and ran his snake down and then put a hose and added water pressure into that pipe. She said you would not believe how many acorns came out the other end of that pipe. Unfortunately, there were so many that they have to get another plumber to come in and drill the wedged acorns out of her plumbing system.

It seems that somehow a cover came off the top of this pipe, and either the birds or squirrels or both have been flinging acorns down the pipe in an effort to store them. Well, now her plumbing is all plugged up with acorns. The almost need some type of auger to clear the impacted acorns... Hopefully that will be cleared in the next few days.

But anyway, now I understand her "Acorn" problems. I couldn't stop laughing, I thought some political group was harassing my mother and I was going to knock a few heads together. I can't imagine having phone problems because a bird or squirrel chose to stuff a phone box full of acorns. The phone man will not be pleased if this has occurred again. She said she is going to find a means to permanently close the breather pipe on her roof so those same critters won't think this pipe is the neatest thing to store acorns in either.... I am so glad I live in AZ where the ground squirrels only put cactus bits in holes....

Until tomorrow...