Funny Sick Bird Story

A few days ago I talked about our sick bird. She seems to have experienced a stroke which has currently paralyzed both of her legs. So all she can do right now to move around is by pulling herself around with her beak and wings. Each day she gets stronger, and we are starting to see some movement with her legs. Her feet do not move at all, one is curled up, the other is just left open. The good news though is that she is learning to use her legs and feet in their current positions. Don't worry, this lead-in is not a bad thing, but preparing you for the funny sick bird story.

My bird is not getting her legs as tangled up as in the first few days, but the bigger problem for her is that she cannot get off the bottom of her cage. Since neither leg works, there is currently no way on God's green earth that she can even think about perching. If she is unable to regain the use of her legs, we are considering building a ramp so that she can climb to a higher area. The problem right now is that she has a problem with pushing herself off of things. Since I have been working with her almost around the clock, she is on the couch or on a pillow a lot. The problem is that when she gets antsy, instead of pulling herself around, she pushes herself backwards and has a propensity for pushing herself off the edge of the couch or pillow, or anything else I may have placed her on.

The newest challenge is finding a place to put the bird when not in the cage. As a result, either Steve or I have to be very vigilant and cannot take our eyes off her for even a moment, for fear she will try to commit suicide by pushing herself off the couch and onto the floor. She is currently too fragile to handle even that foot and a half fall to the carpeted floor. The first few days after her stroke, I had been placing her on my chest so she could rest, stay warm, and I could keep a close eye on her. The first few days she was too weak to do much more than eat and sleep. Now she is getting stronger, and tends to get bored sitting in one position for more than 10 minutes.

Well, as she is improving, she is getting fussier about going to the bathroom. Now, when she has to go, she starts fidigting so that she can move her butt somewhere so that her excretment can go where she is not sitting in it. The problem is that we can't tell when she has to go. Originally she just fidigted because she just wanted to shift position.

Two days ago, she was sitting on Steve's chest, started moving around and ended up getting her tail in his face. He thought that was pretty funny until he hear this nasty fart sound and then all the stuff she had been holding came out. All of this hot, sticky, wet goo when down both sides of his neck. He couldn't move fast because the bird was perched on his chest, and then he had all this stinky poo slithering down the sides of his neck. Since is is not as familiar with handling the bird, he was afraid to pick her up. He had to resort to calling me (I was outside working with the dogs) on my cell phone to get me to come back inside to pick up the bird so he could get up and get the poo off his neck. I couldn't stop laughing, because her stuff stank sooo bad and it was EVERYWHERE on his neck. Even went down his back a little....

Then an even more terrible thing happened, when he tried to take his shirt off over his head, he was unaware of extra poop on the shirt. As he lifted the shirt over his head, he managed to get a mouthful of more poo. I could hear the yelling from the other end of the house...

So, yesterday, again, Steve had the bird this time lower on his belly and she started fidgeting yet again. This time I was inside, heard him bellowing because he thought she had to poop again. I started to come to his rescue until he said she was going to poop. I lost it and couldn't move another muscle. I started laughing hard and he started yelling even more which made me laugh so much more I couldn't move. Then I heard this ungodly fart coming from this little, sick bird, and then the noise of the poop....I was rolling on the floor at this point, and Steve is going crazy because again he was christened with this wet, hot, sticky, stinky stuff now oozing all over his stomach. I am finally able to grab the bird and move her to a clean, dry spot while Steve just starts bouncing around.

I could smell her poop from my location, so I can't imagine how bad it was for Steve. He again was wearing a t-shirt and was not happy about having to once again lift that nasty, dirty, stinky mess over his head. Again, I could not control my laughter. As Steve stalked off to once again change his shirt, I kept snickering as I placed the now happy and comfortable bird back in her cage. One of these days, Steve will learn how to properly pick up a sick bird and not get bit. He will then be able to remove the bird before she empties her intestines on his chest or neck.

The good news is that she is getting stronger every day, she is also having more bowel movements every day which also means she is eating more daily. She is not entirely out of the woods, but her personality is back and she is doing everything she can to bother Steve. (she always likes screwing with Steve) With luck, in the next few weeks she will regain the use of her legs and feet, so she won't be reliant on us to move her around a bunch.

So, even during these trying times, we are able to see the humor in caring a very sick bird. She seems to be enjoying the extra attention, and I can guarantee you that she LOVES having a clean cage. I bet she is holding her poop, waiting for Steve to take her out of the cage. Then she can let loose, get put back into her cage and not have any mess to sit in. She is not a stupid bird...she has us well trained. Steve is going through clean shirts like there is no tomorrow though...perhaps I should get a bib for him...hmmmm...

Until tomorrow...