Scorpion Attacks

Just when I thought things might calm down enough for me to get back to business writing, more fun occurs. Tonight we are going to talk about scorpion attacks. Some of you may have only heard about those nasty little bugs, but for those of us that live in the desert, scorpions are very real. The worse part is they seem to be like the cockroaches of the desert. I have never, ever liked scorpions, I like them even less than spiders. At least with spiders, I catch them and throw them outside. I am not as charitable with scorpions. If I see them, they get squished, no "and's if's or but's" about it.

When I first purchased my current home, despite what the prior owner said (she flat-out lied to me..) the house was infested with scorpions. There was no where I could go where I didn't encounter scorpions. The prior homeowner even left her cats at the house and the only reason I let the cats stay was because I had been told that cats are great at getting rid of scorpions....NOT!!! A word to the wise, do not trust anyone who would willingly leave their cats behind when they sell a home, no matter what they tell you about the cat's amazing ability to keep your home safe. After about a year of squishing scorpions myself, I fired the cats and found a loving home for them (I am allergic to cats, couldn't just give them to a shelter..). After that, I had an exterminator come in regularly to rid the house of unwanted scorpions (and millipedes and all other nasty bugs that were poisonous..)

Since then, the house has been mainly scorpion free. I usually find a scorpion in the house about once or twice a year, that's it. Well, since we have been on the road, I have not had the exterminator in the house (obviously) for a good period of time. Arizona has also apparently had a pretty wet year, and the scorpions are out in force.

So, today, as Steve and I were sitting down in preparation for a conference call, he starts fidgeting with his ear and then begins yelling he was bit... I figured he just poked himself with his hangnail..(yeah, he gets no respect at all...) or pulled a wild hair, but he did start bouncing around and continued yelling. As he is bouncing all over the place claiming he was now stung (a second ago it was bit, then stung, then bit...you get the idea he had NO IDEA what was going on...) we started frantically looking for the culprit so we knew how to counter the bit/sting. We found nothing, which was no surprise. Steve was still bouncing all over, literally flipping anything on the floor over in hopes of finding something, the dogs were frantic and barking, I am trying to methodically find the bug and all of this is happening in a 10x12 room that does have furniture in it... I end up going to the kitchen (still believing he got stung by a spider) to mix a batch of baking soda and water to calm the bite down and then slap the mess on his neck. Try doing that to someone who won't sit still because he couldn't find the offender...

Steve claimed he flicked whatever it was onto the floor, but also tore his shirt off his body. Eventually, after exhausting all other means of searching, he picks up his shirt (I think he was planning on putting it on...) only to discover the offender on the back of his shirt, that nasty little bugger, the bark scorpion. He then proceeds to freak out again, wad the shirt up into a ball and start running for the pool. I wasn't sure what was going in the pool, the shirt, him, the scorpion or the whole group... What we did was lock the dogs inside, we had the shirt, Steve and the scorpion outside. Next task was to squish the bugger, but Steve was barefoot, bare handed and not thinking straight. I take off my flip flops and hand one over so Steve could have the pleasure of the total annihilation.

Steve slapped at that nasty little bugger (about two inches long including it's tail) until it was not twitching anymore. Then, to add insult to injury, Steve grabs some box tape, catches the remainder of the squished scorpion on the tape and proceeds to tape the dead scorpion with detached tail (something about repeated slaps with a flip-flop made the tail break...go figure) onto a piece of paper. He is now carrying that whole mess around with him. We do a quick search on the Internet to find out solutions to scorpion stings and basically found that if you don't have an allergic reaction, you just have to tough out the pain of the sting (which feels like a white-hot pin stuck in your skin) for the next 24 - 48 hours. After that, we did take a trip to the local Fire Department to make sure Steve was not experiencing any of the potentially fatal reactions to a scorpion sting (he wasn't and the FD guy was not entirely impressed with Steve's scorpion stuck on paper...).

So, Steve gets to spend the next 24 - 48 hours with a very sore neck (right behind the ear) and just basically pissed because he got stung. Needless to say, I will have the bug guy back shortly to the house to treat it for all kinds of critters that bite and sting. Steve will survive, his pride is not quite intact, but given a few days, you can bet that 2 inch scorpion will grow in size...even though we still have the exact proof of "who done it...". Now you know what happens when a scorpion attacks, it is not fun, but at least all involved survived...and I think Steve will be carrying that little bugger around with him for some time to come.

Next time you see Steve, ask about his pet scorpion...hehehehe...

For those of you who had been hoping for a more serious business article, that should occur tomorrow, unless we have more excitement. Otherwise, if you are looking for business opportunities, check out our website for some ideas. Please feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions regarding the opportunities listed on the website.

Until tomorrow...